Thankful Thirty #7 (Election Day)

I watched my 18-year-old neighbor cast his first-ever election ballot today and it nearly made me teary.  Over the years I've known him to be a typical teenager-arguing with his parents a lot of the time, pushing the boundaries they have set, and insisting that he's an adult and can make his own decisions even though he's still in high school.  Seeing him truly come of age and make such a mature decision to exercise the right to make his citizen's voice heard was heartening.  

I myself felt the weight that comes with having my personal choice make a difference on election day.  After trying for years to fully understand the electoral college v. popular vote, I will admit it still is a little shady to me.  BUT, I KNOW it is important to make sure my choice and preferences are heard.

Most people who know me will not be surprised when I say the presidential race did not go the way I had been hoping for.  I want to make it really clear that I am not a straight-ticket republican-I had a real struggle deciding which candidate to support in our national Senate race today, and even as I type shortly before midnight, I'm anxiously awaiting the results for our new congressional district, where my preference is for the Democratic candidate.  But I did believe Mitt Romney had a clearer vision and belief in the America that I want to live in.  

I am not going to be angry,though.  I'm not going to let my fears get in the way of my faith.  Instead, tonight I was reminded by the Holy Ghost that President Thomas S. Monson, the President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and the living prophet of the Lord today, is still valiantly guiding us to live righteously.  The Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints are still special witnesses of Jesus Christ and are still striving to spread His message of love and service to all the citizens of the world.  I believe President Dieter F. Uchtdorf when he says,

“Our fate and the fate of our world hinge

 on our hearing and heeding the revealed word of God to His children.”

Whether you voted for Mitt Romney or Barack Obama, whether you exercised your right to vote or stayed at home, whether you woke up this morning with renewed hope or a hesitation over the unknown, I want you to know that my eyes are still firmly looking towards the Lord.  Regardless of which side you are on, know that the Lord has promised great blessings on THIS country.  OUR country.  The United States of America.  Our responsibility?  Our best hope of one day seeing her take her full reward?  Live righteously.  Follow His commandments.  Serve your neighbor more than yourself.  Seek not for riches, but for treasures in Heaven.

I am grateful we can still hope in an America that is great. 

 We, the people, can make it great!

Unfamiliar with 

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and it's teachings?

I hope the links I've provided above will help to answer some of your questions.

In My Heart On Thursday (Opportunity)

 "Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"

-Evan Almighty, 

as quoted on  Latter-day Homeschooling

What Do You Do In a Family?

Yesterday I had the great privilege to teach a lesson at church on family responsibility (basically, parenting).  A week ago I was irrevocably convinced I was the last person on earth qualified to teach that particular lesson and almost called to back out.  As the week progressed I thought to myself, "If any of my neighbors are in class on Sunday, I'll have to feign immediate illness."  They would surely call me out as a completely unqualified hypocrite.  But the Holy Ghost does wonderful things when you turn over your life in humility.  When it was all said and done, the 35 minutes I spent in front of the class was the most spiritual time I've ever felt while teaching.

Here are some of the things the spirit taught to me:

 My kids are children of our Heavenly Father.  They have His spirit, and their spirits studied with Him, learned from Him, and grew to maturity before they were given the opportunity to come to me. When I look at them I need to see what He sees and ask, "Who are you?" instead of "Why are you doing that?" or "What were you thinking."  My role as their mother is as much to learn from them as it is to teach them the things that I know.

In the grand scheme of things, what is really important for me to teach them?  To have faith.  To believe in the power of repentance.  That by making right choices, they can have the Holy Ghost as a constant guide.  And to pray (D&C 68:25, 28).  And if these are the things they are to learn, then I need to be sure to teach them in meekness and with patience.  I need to be ever kind and focused on true knowledge rather than my human confusions.  I need to be able and willing to clarify their mistakes with love.  Everything I do needs to pull them closer towards me rather than build up a moat that pushes them away (D&C 121:41-44)

It is a marvelous thing to have a family and that part of that family compound is a spouse to share both the burdens and the joys. I appreciated the council provided in my lesson material for my husband laying out simply the three things which are essential in his role as a father:

• Being worthy of the sacred calling to be a father and living in a way that allows him to perform in that capacity
• Making it a priority to spend time individually with each of his kids.  To get to know them and build a relationship where they can always feel comfortable calling on him.
• To provide for his family 

I especially appreciated the order of those three things.  His focus, and our focus together, should always be on the spiritual things first.  And while it is his responsibility, if possible, to provide for us, it should never become his main priority.

That brings me, then, to what I should be doing as a mother.  More than anything, my little boys need me to be spending time with them.  They need me to play with them and teach them life doesn't always have to be serious.  Children learn the best through play and I should never pass up the opportunity to listen to the things  they are imagining and dreaming.  

I need to do everything in my power to provide the best example of faithfulness and spiritual strength.  My actions and attitudes go a long way in allowing the spirit to dwell in our home and bring the peace children need to feel when surrounded by family.  Someday they will leave our home and head out into the world.  When they do it won't matter if someone else has to teach them to sew on a button or properly wash the dishes.  I would never dream of leaving their seeds of testimony to be planted and cultivated by the outside world.

A story in The Book of Mormon teaches about of a group of 2000 young men who fought valiantly for their families and their communities in battle.  Through trouble and strife, they ever laid the source of their courage at the feet of their mothers.

...and they were all young men, and they were exceedingly valiant for courage...but behold, this was not all-they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted.  Yea, they were men of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him...yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.  And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers, saying, : "We do not doubt our mothers knew it." Alma 53:20-21, 56:47-48

That brings me to the last, and most important, thing I took away from my lesson yesterday: A mother's testimony can have a profound influence on her children.  I would add that a mother without a strong testimony will have an equally profound influence on the testimonies of the spirits with which she has been entrusted.  And yet, we are not alone.  Being a parent is far from easy and there will continue to be times when my spirit is dampened and trampled.  Yet I know there is no need to worry.  The Lord is watching over me.

A Lesson For the Class

"Cleanliness is next to Godliness."

The Relief Society room filled with gentle chuckles when a sister offered this as one of the most important things we can teach our children in our homes.  In preparing the lesson I had anticipated many more answers like this-the temporal lessons taught by parents.  Instead, the ladies in the room had humbled me with long lists of values and attributes they've taught their little ones-honesty, respect, to love the scriptures.  I secretly cheered that there was at least one sister in the room who's home, like mine, has not yet become a permanent haven of heaven on earth. She continued, "If the Saviour were on the Earth today, would he want to come into your home?"

It seemed like a simple enough thought to me and we returned to listing divine characteristics all children are apparently supposed to know before they head off to school.  Then, a screeching halt.  A sister in the back row raised her hand and proclaimed, "I'm going to have to disagree with that sister over there."  She went on to voice her opinion that the Saviour is not going to care what your house looks like when he comes again.  Her intention was good, but the comment was actually quite offensive, and standing in the front of the room I could see the first sister's feelings had been hurt.  Unfortunately, I have not yet become perfect at diffusing these types of situations in class and I chose to move on to the next part of the lesson rather than make this a point of discussion.  That was two days ago and the entire event keeps playing itself out in my mind. 

Here is how I now know I should have responded:

I understand both viewpoints and don't believe either one of them is completely wrong.  The Lord has said, "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." (Rev. 3:20) The question needs to be not whether or not the Saviour will want to visit me, but whether or not I keep my home in order so as to feel comfortable when the Saviour comes to visit me.

Latter-Day Saints have been instructed to keep their homes like a temple. I'm sure similar sentiments are taught across many world religions.  The Holy Ghost does not dwell in unholy places, places of clutter and disorganization.  And certainly it is much more difficult to recognize the promptings of the Spirit when our minds are distracted by busyness and a backlog of responsibilities.  As with the story of Martha and Mary we need to ask ourselves if we have prepared well enough for the Saviour's arrival so that we might sit at His feet and absorb the love He brings for us.

It is important to keep an orderly home and to teach our children that importance.  Associate Professor Shirley R. Klein remarked, "Everyday activities in our homes may be simple, but because they are simple, frequent, and repeated, they offer important opportunities to build individuals and families." So where do we find the balance?  I've often been told that a home where children are loved is a home well-lived in.  In other words, there are going to be toys on the floor.  The dishes may not always be done and the beds may not always be made.  Is this the sign of a sloppy lazy family?  Not necessarily.

Look around a little further.  Is there children's artwork hanging on the refrigerator?  Are the little ones playing together while their parents help older siblings with homework?  Have the children been taught by example that there is a time and place for controlled chaos as well as for quiet and order?  Or, are the children's toys under lock and key for fear of appearing less than perfect to the visiting teachers?  Are the floors shining and the windows gleaming in the middle of the day even though the children are bored and begging for attention and love?  The Saviour will recognize our best intentions.  We need to determine whether or not our best intentions will have been enough on that great and glorious day.

Had I been brilliant enough to spout out all that to the class on Sunday, I'd either have received oodles of hallway compliments after class or been quickly released from my calling.  Either way, it has left me thinking more deeply.  Obviously the state of our earthly home is not going to be what keeps us from being embraced by the Saviour.  That will be determined by the state of our hearts in the moment He arrives. Our work until then is to strive towards living in a "house of order."

So let me ask these questions to the class:  If the Saviour came today could He dwell within your heart?  Would  the clutter and distraction make you unable to recognize the lightness of your burdens being lifted?  Is the balance between your devotion to the Lord and Jesus Christ weighted with things of this world or divine desires of the soul?

When He stands outside and knocks will you hear His voice and let Him enter in or will the rush to clean up the house keep you from opening the door? 

Bringing the Spirit Into Our Home

Talk given Sunday, May 31, 2009 When Beck was born he brought with him the spirit of heaven and looking at him Ben and I were able to gain a strong testimony of the Father's love for us and His plan of salvation. For months our home was filled with love and the spirit that was exuding from our precious little boy. Since then we have fallen back into the habit of not always noticing the special feelings that come along with living gospel-centered lives. The Proclamation on the Family states,

"Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ." The principles necessary for happiness include prayer, forgiveness, and love to be taught and practiced in the home regularly. President Ezra Taft Benson said, "One great thing the Lord requires of each of us is to provide a home where a happy, positive influence for good exists. In future years the costliness of home furnishings or the number of bathrooms will not matter much...It will greatly matter whether there was happiness and laughter, or bickering and contention." Let's first focus on the importance of creating routine and consistency with the gospel in our homes. Whether your family is a star-example of daily individual and family scripture study and prayer or your family is more like ours where it's a daily struggle to accomplish just one thing that invites the spirit, the things we do need to be so regular that everyone in the family can recognize the spirit received from the actions. I can share a couple personal examples. Years before I had any interest in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints I would visit at the homes of friends who were church members. On many occasions I would be asked to join the family in their mealtime or nightly prayers. Though most of the time I would politely say no, the spirit in their homes spoke to me while I listened from another room. The family gathered together and recounted the things they were grateful or remembered people with special needs. It was quickly obvious to me the homes in which this was an important nightly ritual and the homes that were going through the motions to try and impress their guest. In Ben's parents' home the spirit is almost always strongly felt. They raised 15 children strong in the gospel and when the family gets together it's almost always a time of laughter and happiness. We gather together regularly for what we call "Sing Thing" to sing hymns and other silly songs as well as read the scriptures and share a family prayer. I've always felt comfortable there and have seen numerous non-members feel right at home as they've joined over the years. In contrast, shortly before my baptism several of my sisters had traveled to Utah during spring break. Ben's parents were excited to meet them and invited us all over for dinner. After dinner we gathered in the living room, but instead of the usual round of singing and stories, Ben's parents had decided to play a church video and have a short religious discussion. Though their intentions were extremely good, it was not something that happened in their home consistently and it felt quite obvious that the spirit was being forced rather than laying itself peacefully upon the hearts in the room. This was not the way the Spirit was normally invited into the Hiatt home and in that particular instance it reached the opposite effect to the one which had been desired. Trying to consistently teach Beck to say his prayers and read his scriptures has given us an additional blessing outside our home. When we travel to my parents home the spirit gently encourages us to do those things we regularly do at home. We invite anyone who is there to join in saying Beck's nightly prayers and so far they have never said no. In the gospel we are taught the importance of knowledge and learning. In my life right now, as a stay-at-home mom, I have the opportunity to witness learning in a special way. This leads me to second idea we should focus on. We need to take time to recognize and appreciate how the Spirit is in our homes each day. Beck is two-years-old and gaining new skills in every waking moment-New words, new songs, how to carry on conversations with his stuffed animals and how to get them to talk back, how to fix a toy that's broken and how to play by himself or get mama's attention when playing alone isn't fun anymore. It's too easy for me to get busy on the computer or reading a book or doing housework and miss everything he is learning. I have found one of the quickest ways to bring peace into my environment and a smile to my face is to just stop whatever I'm doing and watch him from a distance. It reminds me that even though his body is young and fragile, his spirit is strong and growing. Those small quiet moments while I'm watching him and smiling reassure me that feels and also contributes to the spirit that is in our home and he is receiving the blessings that come with it. I want to quickly mention another way we can be sure to notice and appreciate the spirit in our homes. At night after Beck is in bed and the sun has gone down Ben and I like to set out on the front step and lye in bed and look at the moon. Setting in the quiet, watching a breeze in the trees, and listening to the birds reminds us how small we are in the world. It helps us re-focus on the principles of the gospel which are so much more important than who's going to do the dishes or what's coming on tv. I'm grateful for the prompting to study this topic this week. While looking for ideas on lds.org I watched a video posted on the homepage. It was a clip of Henry B. Eyring at a recent church general conference. He was telling about a journal he has kept since the time his children were small. In it, at the end of each day, he records little things that happened during the day. He asks himself, "Have I seen the hand of God in my life today? Did God send a message that was just for me?" I'm going to try to add these two questions to the quiet time I have at the end of every day. I encourage you to do the same. Have I seen the hand of God in my life today? Did God send a message that was just for me?

A Heavenly Scare

I can't believe I quit writing so quickly after the beginning of the year-New Year's Resolutions...aargh! I'm not feeling inspired to write anything insightful, but I want to keep trying to make writing a habit, so today I'm going to copy down a journal entry I wrote a few weeks ago... We had a scary experience last night (8/16). We went camping at Hope Campground up the Provo Canyon. Beck had so much fun walking around & playing with sticks & rocks. He wore his flannel to match Daddy, but then Daddy didn't bring his flannel (or any warm clothes). After our dinner of shrimp & crab we laid Beck down in our tent. To our surprise he barely whimpered & fell right to sleep. After too many s'mores we also crawled in bed. Unfortunately the tent zippers woke Beck up & he felt his 2 1/2 hour nap was good enough. He exploded into hyper sleep-deprived mode. It was cute & funny for about 10 minutes before we realized he wasn't going to calm down. He was crawling over us, scratching, pulling hair & falling down with his head smacking the ground. He wasn't safe to himself. Ben finally had too much and we decided maybe Beck needed familiarity. Ben took him to the car and put him in his carseat. A long while later they returned to the tent, but neither of their moods had changed. Beck was still out of control and Ben was exhausted and at his wits' end. We tried to ignore Beck but he was inflicting pain on us and himself. Finally I told Ben to just go strap him in the car and crack the window open. My hope was that he'd tire himself out quickly but in a confined space where he'd be safe. Also he'd be away from us. I had a bad feeling about putting him in the car. He'd be away from us, but then I thought that he always sleeps in his own room away from us. There are always horror stories on the news of kids being left in cars and I was thinking of how warm the car might get before he woke up in the morning. Also I didn't want him sitting in the car and thinking we had left him. Ben took him and I told myself he'd be fine only 50 feet away with the window open so we could hear him. We went to sleep and it seemed like Beck had accepted it and went straight to sleep. Some time later I was pulled out of sleep by faint crying. There had been a crying baby further away and I thought it was her until the crying didn't stop. I told Ben that Beck was crying and asked if he'd locked the car. He barely muffled a sleepy no. I hurried out of my sleeping bag and out of the tent. I had to go around to the far side of the car and as I opened the door I looked for Beck in his carseat. He wasn't there. In the dark I could barely make out anything and Beck's cries still sounded muffled. I looked around quickly and there face-down on the floor was my baby. In the way time often is during panic mode, the next 30 seconds happened in slow motion. The front seat was reclined and I fumbled to get it out of the way before I could get to Beck. Confused and scare I wondered why Ben put him to sleep on the floor before I realized Beck hadn't been strapped in and had fallen on the floor. As I picked him up I feared the worst and prepared myself for blood and a broken nose or worse. Straining in the moonlight to see, I scooped Beck up and wrapped him in his blanket. He instantly cuddled into me and, with his binkie, went back to sleep. I carried him back to the tent and carefully laid him down with love and safety between his parents. I told Ben what had happened and asked why he hadn't strapped Beck in. At the time I was seething mad and couldn't believe my husband could be so selfishly careless. He voiced to me that he'd thought Beck would be okay and was thinking to himself, "Well, why didn't you tell me to strap him in." By wings of a prayer we got home very late and still showered and made it to 1:00 church with time to spare. As I sat through the meetings the events played themselves out in my mind again and again. I finally found peace as I realized that our son is protected. I believe the Lord tried to tell me there was trouble ahead. He knew beforehand that Ben would not strap him in and tried to warn me. Ben had the same promptings and also decided it would be okay because it was like sleeping in his room. I don't know what happened in the car. Maybe Beck used the reclined chair as a stair and climbed down onto the floor. Maybe he slid out of his chair like he does when we get him out. Or maybe he fell out as he groped around in the dark. What I do know now is that when his parents had failed him, the hand of the Lord protected him. I now that Beck found a cushion beneath him and loving arms around him. I know that when he was scared, his Heavenly Father comforted him and with patience called out again to tell me my son was in need. I'm grateful for the Savior who has allowed for repentance after neglect. I am glad for a loving Heavenly Father who understands and wants us to succeed. I'm especially grateful that the Lord knows my son and holds him up in his time of need.