Thankful Thirty #14 (Organization)

I am grateful for organization in times of trouble.

Thankful Thirty #7 (Election Day)

I watched my 18-year-old neighbor cast his first-ever election ballot today and it nearly made me teary.  Over the years I've known him to be a typical teenager-arguing with his parents a lot of the time, pushing the boundaries they have set, and insisting that he's an adult and can make his own decisions even though he's still in high school.  Seeing him truly come of age and make such a mature decision to exercise the right to make his citizen's voice heard was heartening.  

I myself felt the weight that comes with having my personal choice make a difference on election day.  After trying for years to fully understand the electoral college v. popular vote, I will admit it still is a little shady to me.  BUT, I KNOW it is important to make sure my choice and preferences are heard.

Most people who know me will not be surprised when I say the presidential race did not go the way I had been hoping for.  I want to make it really clear that I am not a straight-ticket republican-I had a real struggle deciding which candidate to support in our national Senate race today, and even as I type shortly before midnight, I'm anxiously awaiting the results for our new congressional district, where my preference is for the Democratic candidate.  But I did believe Mitt Romney had a clearer vision and belief in the America that I want to live in.  

I am not going to be angry,though.  I'm not going to let my fears get in the way of my faith.  Instead, tonight I was reminded by the Holy Ghost that President Thomas S. Monson, the President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and the living prophet of the Lord today, is still valiantly guiding us to live righteously.  The Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints are still special witnesses of Jesus Christ and are still striving to spread His message of love and service to all the citizens of the world.  I believe President Dieter F. Uchtdorf when he says,

“Our fate and the fate of our world hinge

 on our hearing and heeding the revealed word of God to His children.”

Whether you voted for Mitt Romney or Barack Obama, whether you exercised your right to vote or stayed at home, whether you woke up this morning with renewed hope or a hesitation over the unknown, I want you to know that my eyes are still firmly looking towards the Lord.  Regardless of which side you are on, know that the Lord has promised great blessings on THIS country.  OUR country.  The United States of America.  Our responsibility?  Our best hope of one day seeing her take her full reward?  Live righteously.  Follow His commandments.  Serve your neighbor more than yourself.  Seek not for riches, but for treasures in Heaven.

I am grateful we can still hope in an America that is great. 

 We, the people, can make it great!

Unfamiliar with 

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and it's teachings?

I hope the links I've provided above will help to answer some of your questions.

Thankful Thirty #2

Source:  via Pinterest

The first 4 months of my last pregnancy were not pleasant.  I was exhausted and my body was broken down.  Feeling completely different than I did when I was pregnant with both my boys, every person I know had decided I must be carrying a girl.  I thought they must be right...but it didn't matter.  I was sick and being tested to the edge of what I could bear.

There were days it took all I had to pour cold cereal and turn on the television for Beck and Peyton before falling back into bed for the rest of the day.  It was on those days that I knew this was it for me.  Three babies was going to have to be what made up our family.  Doubled over and in tears I plead with the Lord to give me the strength and willpower to make it through my delivery and then apologized to my husband that this was going to have to be our last child.  Enduring another pregnancy was just not going to happen for me.

At the same time my husband was secretly pleading with the Lord to take this burden from me.  He was feeling guilty for the role he played in bringing this weakness upon me, and he was begging to be able to endure it for me.  As blessed as he knew we are to bring newborn spirits into our family, he admitted to God that he never wanted to see me feeling this way again.

We both knew this would be the completing of our family.

And here brings in the focus of my gratitude today:  The Lord knew too.  He heard our prayers and listened to our pleas.  He didn't chastise us for reacting in such a temporal moment, but wrapped his arms around our arms and answered back,

 "I believe you and I understand what you are going through. 

 I am near you and I will continue to be right here with you."

That is when we found out we were having twins.   

The Lord knew our hearts and recognized what he had asked of me.  Yet He also knew he had a plan for our family and it included more than just one more being.  He accepted my terms of defeat and did what he could to do to make sure His plan for us was complete.  If I, with my earthly mind and suffering, had decided to not be pregnant ever again, He sent the spirits He had left for us into the world together.

I do not know what our future holds.  There may be a day yet when we decide we do need to grow our family.  What I do know is that in the moment when I needed the Lord to accept all I had left to give to Him, he kept in mind His plan for me.  

I am grateful for a Heavenly Father 
so personally familiar with me and with His plan for me.

Jumping On Pre-Bandwagon

I'm going on record today to declare I'm voting Ann Romney for next First Lady!  I don't know how that's going to work since I'm not yet enamoured with her husband, who would obviously have to be elected in order for my vote to make a difference, but every time I hear her speak my heart is stirred and I find myself longing for genuine compassion and transparent values in the White House.

I do not necessarily have a bone to pick with Michelle Obama.  I believe she's a great mom and she has championed worthy causes during her time of influence, but she does not inspire me.  I won't go into the reasons why-I'm not sure I've investigated them all within myself.  What I am aware of is an emotional yearning to be encouraged and led by someone like me.

Now, Ann Romney and I obviously are not the same people in innumerable ways.  Our upbringing and backgrounds are caverns apart.  Our husbands have chosen vastly different career paths.  Her health struggles are immensely more challenging than anything I've thus far been asked to bear.  Acknowledging all that, I listened to this interview several months ago and was brought to tears realizing that in so many ways she is just like me.

 
This clip is long, but I hope you'll listen.  
Again, not for Mitt Romney's words, but for hers. 

Here I will admit that my thoughts do have an LDS connection, but I am NOT telling you I like Ann Romneybecause she's a Mormon.  Prior to listening to this interview, I had never considered or believed that members of the LDS church talk differently than other people.  Yet, I listened to her speak about her family, her love and her fears for them, and I believed she could be any lady I've ever sat next to in a church Relief Society Meeting.  She wasn't speaking tenets of doctrine.  She was speaking from what is truly in her heart.  She holds her family together-leads them and guides them-through her faith and conviction.  I know she would do that as well for our country.

Also a little while ago, I happened to be clicking through the channels and landed on this diatribe by Neil Cavuto.  

While not entirely his typical snarky wit and humor, the sentiments once again moved me to tears and left me begging for the stars to align and put this remarkable woman on the national stage where she can work to motivate the American people in the same way she inspires me.

If the political talking heads are ever right about anything, we are about to be enveloped by video of Ann Romney stumping for her husband on the campaign trail.  The next time you see her introducing her husband or hear someone criticizing Mitt's likability, I hope you'll take a deeper look into Ann's genuine intentions and think what it would be like to have that kind of woman standing beside the President of our United States.

In My Heart On Thursday

-Via Pinterest

In My Heart On Thursday

As I prepare to head home for the holidays, I wish you a very Merry Christmas. 
Enjoy the time you have to spend with family and I'll see you again next week!

-Michelle, Wandering Still

In My Heart On Thursday

Testimony

I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  I joined the church nearly 10 years ago and have been grateful ever since.  On a day to day basis, I'm most grateful for the comfort and reassurance I receive from the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  I know that he sacrificed much in order to give us the knowledge we would need to return to live with our Heavenly Father, and that after all my efforts to live well have failed, that sacrifice allows me to try again another day.  

My membership in the church has give me so many great opportunities to serve the people around me and to exercise humility in also being served.  I've worked with and learned from the Primary age children, Sunday School classes and the sisters in the Relief Society.  Indeed, I'm especially grateful for the Relief Society.  As a teacher, I learn as much from studying and preparing my lessons as I do from the comments and experiences shared by the ladies I am teaching.  I'm surrounded by women with pure hearts and regularly presented with opportunities to serve them in times of need.  I've been the recipient of meals and unexpected letters of encouragement and love the opportunity to share that joy with others.

I believe the Book of Mormon is a book of Scripture that clarifies many of the teachings in the Bible.  Reading it strengthens my testimony of Jesus Christ and the principles we need to learn during mortality.  It helps me understand the united purpose and goal of the Godhead and I always feel uplifted after reading it.  I believe prayer is our line of communication with the Father, and through the Scriptures we can receive our answers.  I  know that understanding what has been written will help me to receive my own personal revelations for the questions and problems I have everyday.

I believe in a Heavenly Father who loves and wants us to one day be reunited with Him.  I believe His son Jesus Christ paid the ultimate price to guarantee that possibility.  I'm grateful for the love they have for me. And I'm grateful for my membership in a church that supports me as an imperfect person while helping me strive to achieve my divine potential one day.

A-S

In My Heart On Thursday

"We have free will, and the Devil also has things in his mind too."

-Donald Kraybill, Amish Grace

When the Lord Calls You...

My parents moved to Alabama.  Two months ago my dad volunteered for a one-week missionary & construction trip serving an area devastated by last spring's overactive tornado season.  By the time he returned home, the Lord had spoken to his heart and he knew he was being called to dedicate more time to the work and the people in the hills of Alabama.  Everything else just fell into place...

Within weeks the finances to cover obligations at home had wondrously appeared, as well as the beginnings of what they would need to move from Iowa to Alabama and modestly survive while they are there.  Circumstances at my mother's job had been building towards an opportunity for long-term leave for quite awhile and made sense completely as soon as this opportunity was presented to her.  And another family member seeking a new beginning in her own life was right there to take over the day-to-day responsibilities my parent's would be leaving behind for an undetermined amount of time.

That's how they got to Alabama.  Here is what they are doing:  

Working directly with the organization Carpenter's House and the program Mercy Flows, my parent's find themselves working with volunteer labor and donated resources in an effort to help rebuild a rural area in northeastern Alabama devastated by multiple tornadoes during a one-week time period this last April.  My father's background as a construction foreman and owner of a small construction company have helped him seamlessly step into his new role coordinating the 10+ projects that Mercy Flows currently has in varying stages of the re-building process.  Along with getting her hands dirty right next to his, my mom has found her own niche getting to know the homeowners and community members personally by learning their histories, hearing their tornado-related experiences, and sharing encouraging moments of prayer with them and their families.  Together, they've left a house behind to live in a small camper trailer and serve wherever they are needed.

It's been an interesting few months for my family as we get used to the decision my parent's have made.  Even though I moved far away from home more than 10 years ago, part of me feels sad and alone knowing they are not there.  Some of my sisters were confused at the idea that they would just drop everything and leave; others didn't take it seriously until my parents had packed up and driven away.  Yet, in the first three updates we've received on the work getting done in my mom and dad's new home, it is impossible to deny that the Lord has important work for them to do there.

I hope you will visit my parent's website and learn more about the area in Alabama which they are working, more about the work that is being done, and opportunities for you and the people you know to share your support by getting involved.  Add the link for their blog to your reader.  And if it moves you, remember them, the people of Alabama, and the rest of my family in your prayers.


More information available at Built On Grace Alone.  Once on the site, follow the blog on the News page.  And if you do click over there, please come back to leave a comment on something you have learned.  I'll be happy to return the kindness with an extra entry for each of my upcoming Blogtastic Extravaganza giveaways. 

What Do You Do In a Family?

Yesterday I had the great privilege to teach a lesson at church on family responsibility (basically, parenting).  A week ago I was irrevocably convinced I was the last person on earth qualified to teach that particular lesson and almost called to back out.  As the week progressed I thought to myself, "If any of my neighbors are in class on Sunday, I'll have to feign immediate illness."  They would surely call me out as a completely unqualified hypocrite.  But the Holy Ghost does wonderful things when you turn over your life in humility.  When it was all said and done, the 35 minutes I spent in front of the class was the most spiritual time I've ever felt while teaching.

Here are some of the things the spirit taught to me:

 My kids are children of our Heavenly Father.  They have His spirit, and their spirits studied with Him, learned from Him, and grew to maturity before they were given the opportunity to come to me. When I look at them I need to see what He sees and ask, "Who are you?" instead of "Why are you doing that?" or "What were you thinking."  My role as their mother is as much to learn from them as it is to teach them the things that I know.

In the grand scheme of things, what is really important for me to teach them?  To have faith.  To believe in the power of repentance.  That by making right choices, they can have the Holy Ghost as a constant guide.  And to pray (D&C 68:25, 28).  And if these are the things they are to learn, then I need to be sure to teach them in meekness and with patience.  I need to be ever kind and focused on true knowledge rather than my human confusions.  I need to be able and willing to clarify their mistakes with love.  Everything I do needs to pull them closer towards me rather than build up a moat that pushes them away (D&C 121:41-44)

It is a marvelous thing to have a family and that part of that family compound is a spouse to share both the burdens and the joys. I appreciated the council provided in my lesson material for my husband laying out simply the three things which are essential in his role as a father:

• Being worthy of the sacred calling to be a father and living in a way that allows him to perform in that capacity
• Making it a priority to spend time individually with each of his kids.  To get to know them and build a relationship where they can always feel comfortable calling on him.
• To provide for his family 

I especially appreciated the order of those three things.  His focus, and our focus together, should always be on the spiritual things first.  And while it is his responsibility, if possible, to provide for us, it should never become his main priority.

That brings me, then, to what I should be doing as a mother.  More than anything, my little boys need me to be spending time with them.  They need me to play with them and teach them life doesn't always have to be serious.  Children learn the best through play and I should never pass up the opportunity to listen to the things  they are imagining and dreaming.  

I need to do everything in my power to provide the best example of faithfulness and spiritual strength.  My actions and attitudes go a long way in allowing the spirit to dwell in our home and bring the peace children need to feel when surrounded by family.  Someday they will leave our home and head out into the world.  When they do it won't matter if someone else has to teach them to sew on a button or properly wash the dishes.  I would never dream of leaving their seeds of testimony to be planted and cultivated by the outside world.

A story in The Book of Mormon teaches about of a group of 2000 young men who fought valiantly for their families and their communities in battle.  Through trouble and strife, they ever laid the source of their courage at the feet of their mothers.

...and they were all young men, and they were exceedingly valiant for courage...but behold, this was not all-they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted.  Yea, they were men of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him...yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.  And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers, saying, : "We do not doubt our mothers knew it." Alma 53:20-21, 56:47-48

That brings me to the last, and most important, thing I took away from my lesson yesterday: A mother's testimony can have a profound influence on her children.  I would add that a mother without a strong testimony will have an equally profound influence on the testimonies of the spirits with which she has been entrusted.  And yet, we are not alone.  Being a parent is far from easy and there will continue to be times when my spirit is dampened and trampled.  Yet I know there is no need to worry.  The Lord is watching over me.

In My Heart On Thursday

(My 100th post, woohoo!)

"Never make a principle out of your experience; 

let God be as original with other people as he is with you."

-Oswald Chambers

Meet My...

...Father-In-Law...

Duane Hiatt

Interesting Fact #1: Duane and his wife Diane brought 15 hilarious and thoughtful people into the world.  After Diane passed away from ovarian cancer, Duane and his 15 kids relied on their faith that the family is central to the Lord's plan and that He had a plan for each one of them.  A year later an equally faith-filled woman named Sharon came into their lives and together the 17 of them continued onward into the world.  Now, nearly 25 years later 17 has grown to 87 with 15 spouses, 54 grandchildren, and the oldest grandchild's fiance joining the family this year.

Interesting Fact #2:  There is a fairly short song every LDS Primary child knows called, "Follow the Prophet," (9 verses is short for a kid's song, right?).  Asked to write the song only weeks after Diane had passed away, the song holds special meaning to our family and Duane continues to share the message portrayed in the song whenever he has the opportunity.   

Interesting Fact #3  Duane is the only rock star I know.  Really!  In the days of Elvis and the Beetles he performed in a band called  "The Three D's." Touring across the United States, Canada, and Asia in a time when the face of music was changing, they found increasing success by keeping a clean image and entertaining without lowering their moral standards.  Their music is particularly refreshing today when #1 hits too often are denigrating and evocatively offensive.  Covering both religious and secular subjects and songs, each album has distinct character.  My personal favorite album is Rhyme, Rhythm, and Reason-Great Poetry Set to Music.

My father-in-law has lived a full life and earned the right to sit and rest, but that's not who he is.  He continues guiding the people around him with big ideas and entertaining delivery.  The Three D's message is as essential and applicable as it was when three young family men first took it out on the road and that is the reason I'm sharing this part of my life with you!

For your last chance at an early entry in my A Blogtastic Extravaganza giveaway, leave a comment here telling me something from this post that has peaked your curiosity!

In My Heart On Thursday

-Lisa Jan South,  Ensign, Febrary 2011

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints held their annual General Conference this weekend.  Available almost immediately world-wide via internet streaming and radio broadcast, I still appreciate the blessing of living in Utah and being able to watch it live on network tv.  This year I tried to keep my boys interested with coloring pages and crafts that taught the names of the leaders who were speaking.  For the first time in many years I was able to enjoy all four sessions without too many child distractions.  

So many of the messages spoke directly to troubles or worries I have in my life, but the talk I can't get out of my head today was by Elder Lynn G. Robbins.

The difference between "doing" and "being."  I asked my husband last night what he needs from me-how I can be a better wife and make his life more enjoyable.  I was expecting a long list of chores like "put away the laundry instead of leaving it folded in the clothes basket for a week" and "have all the toys put away when I get home from work at the end of the day."  Instead he poured out his heart with his desires for me to remember the beautiful person I was when we were first together.  He didn't have a big gold star to award me when I finished a checklist of household duties.  Instead he shared the pain he feels as he sees me pulling away from him and our kids, and his fear that one day I will wake up not able to remember what it means to be happy.

Now, there's no need to rush out and put me into therapy.  I have spent a lot of time lately very introverted and selfishly looking only at me.  There's a slippery slope in that and I've allowed myself to start down it.  Not too far down, though and to see that today is very refreshing.

The reason it matters to me so much all of a sudden?  A great opportunity to fulfill a dream has opened up unexpectedly.  It's the right time and will be incredibly successful, but I don't have my cards in order.  Quite a few other messages given this weekend stressed the importance of being ready for the blessings of eternity when they become available to you.  Obviously I'm already married and have two beautiful little boys; what I've neglected to work on is my time management and putting them at the center of my life.  It's hard to convince them that starting a huge new endeavour won't leave them even more in the peripheral of my eye.

And so, that is what I am starting on today.  Rededicating myself to the small and simple things-daily prayer and scripture study, listening and praising, putting away the laundry and maybe even helping wash the dishes.  The other project is going to move forward and that's exciting as well as scary.  Hopefully re-creating the strength of love for my family, myself, and my relationship with my Heavenly Father will be the piece of the puzzle that makes this upcoming venture attainable.

The Devil Hates You

That's what my husband said to me last night.  I had just told him I was really unhappy and felt like I was being punished for 15 years of selfish decisions.  He saw it differently.  This is what he had to say:

We have two incredible children.  The older is brilliant and funny and incredibly hard to lead.  He lives life with complete emotion and isn't easily swayed to do what he knows is wrong.  The younger brought to earth the joy of heaven and a smile that can brighten even the darkest day.  They are both supported by the love of their Heavenly Father and my role is to raise them righteously.  As strong as they are, they will still need a mother who can teach them how to love and serve and rely on the powers of the Atonement in hopes of returning to live with their Father in Heaven.

The devil is aware.  He knows the struggle it's going to be to get at my children and attacks the target he sees as weak.  That's me.

"...and he shall wear out the saints of the most High..."-Daniel 7:25

A few weeks ago I read an enlightening commentary on the Devil as Accuser.  The author described Satan as the one who incites us to sin and then stands by to remind us, accuse us, and taunt us about every thing we have ever done wrong.  My husband equated the devil to "The Big Tattle-Tale." When he stands before God and brags about the terrible we are doing, the Lord turns away without giving his words one moment of thought.  Not to be rebuked, though, the devil retreats and returns to working on an audience more receptive to his message.

"And the dragon was wroth with the woman, and went to make war with the remnant of her seed, which keep the commandments of God, and have the testimony of Jesus Christ."-Revelations 12:17

It became clear to me after reading this article and doing my own study of the scriptures that Satan is after the righteous.  He has nothing to gain from a person living a life less than that.  That is the point my husband, last night, was making.  As I try to follow the commandments of God and raise my boys to make righteous choices, the devil attacks me.  He gets afraid of losing ground and when I don't make it easy for him he sends his minions to surround me with a constant barrage of evil thoughts, self doubt, and thoughts of giving in to make sure that he wins in the end.

"Submit yourselves, therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you...For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us...that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."-James 4:7, Romans 8:18,38-39

My night and conversation with my husband did not end with a great lightening of worries and cares; the devil's stronghold is hard to break.  But I was able to get out of bed this morning knowing that I have a new opportunity each day to access the blessings of the Savior's Atonement for me. The Devil may hate me, but the Lord has not given up on me.  He will protect me, and my boys, until that day when I can once again stand before Him full of humility and account that I tried my hardest with the life that was given to me.  

A Lesson For the Class

"Cleanliness is next to Godliness."

The Relief Society room filled with gentle chuckles when a sister offered this as one of the most important things we can teach our children in our homes.  In preparing the lesson I had anticipated many more answers like this-the temporal lessons taught by parents.  Instead, the ladies in the room had humbled me with long lists of values and attributes they've taught their little ones-honesty, respect, to love the scriptures.  I secretly cheered that there was at least one sister in the room who's home, like mine, has not yet become a permanent haven of heaven on earth. She continued, "If the Saviour were on the Earth today, would he want to come into your home?"

It seemed like a simple enough thought to me and we returned to listing divine characteristics all children are apparently supposed to know before they head off to school.  Then, a screeching halt.  A sister in the back row raised her hand and proclaimed, "I'm going to have to disagree with that sister over there."  She went on to voice her opinion that the Saviour is not going to care what your house looks like when he comes again.  Her intention was good, but the comment was actually quite offensive, and standing in the front of the room I could see the first sister's feelings had been hurt.  Unfortunately, I have not yet become perfect at diffusing these types of situations in class and I chose to move on to the next part of the lesson rather than make this a point of discussion.  That was two days ago and the entire event keeps playing itself out in my mind. 

Here is how I now know I should have responded:

I understand both viewpoints and don't believe either one of them is completely wrong.  The Lord has said, "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." (Rev. 3:20) The question needs to be not whether or not the Saviour will want to visit me, but whether or not I keep my home in order so as to feel comfortable when the Saviour comes to visit me.

Latter-Day Saints have been instructed to keep their homes like a temple. I'm sure similar sentiments are taught across many world religions.  The Holy Ghost does not dwell in unholy places, places of clutter and disorganization.  And certainly it is much more difficult to recognize the promptings of the Spirit when our minds are distracted by busyness and a backlog of responsibilities.  As with the story of Martha and Mary we need to ask ourselves if we have prepared well enough for the Saviour's arrival so that we might sit at His feet and absorb the love He brings for us.

It is important to keep an orderly home and to teach our children that importance.  Associate Professor Shirley R. Klein remarked, "Everyday activities in our homes may be simple, but because they are simple, frequent, and repeated, they offer important opportunities to build individuals and families." So where do we find the balance?  I've often been told that a home where children are loved is a home well-lived in.  In other words, there are going to be toys on the floor.  The dishes may not always be done and the beds may not always be made.  Is this the sign of a sloppy lazy family?  Not necessarily.

Look around a little further.  Is there children's artwork hanging on the refrigerator?  Are the little ones playing together while their parents help older siblings with homework?  Have the children been taught by example that there is a time and place for controlled chaos as well as for quiet and order?  Or, are the children's toys under lock and key for fear of appearing less than perfect to the visiting teachers?  Are the floors shining and the windows gleaming in the middle of the day even though the children are bored and begging for attention and love?  The Saviour will recognize our best intentions.  We need to determine whether or not our best intentions will have been enough on that great and glorious day.

Had I been brilliant enough to spout out all that to the class on Sunday, I'd either have received oodles of hallway compliments after class or been quickly released from my calling.  Either way, it has left me thinking more deeply.  Obviously the state of our earthly home is not going to be what keeps us from being embraced by the Saviour.  That will be determined by the state of our hearts in the moment He arrives. Our work until then is to strive towards living in a "house of order."

So let me ask these questions to the class:  If the Saviour came today could He dwell within your heart?  Would  the clutter and distraction make you unable to recognize the lightness of your burdens being lifted?  Is the balance between your devotion to the Lord and Jesus Christ weighted with things of this world or divine desires of the soul?

When He stands outside and knocks will you hear His voice and let Him enter in or will the rush to clean up the house keep you from opening the door? 

To Be Loved

I had the privilege to attend a talk by Elvin R. Tanner last week.  He is an accomplished psychologist and professor.  He and his wife live in my church ward and are such a great example.  Married more than 50 years, they still dote over each other and can count the number of arguments they've had on one hand.  The topic of the talk was love.  Any lecture with such generic subject matter has the possibility of being very bland, but my heart was touched.  The Lord gently reproved me for laziness in my most important relationships and encouraged me through expert advice to wake on a new day and share my love in the way He shares His love with me every day.

"Do you know how hard it is to love a porcupine?"

Think about that for a moment.  Originally the question was asked by a mother to her contentious teenage daughter (thanks, Emily, for sharing).  Tired of hearing her daughter proclaim, "You don't love me!", the mother decided to pull her aside and explain this very simple life lesson.  It changed their relationship tremendously.

Are teenagers the only prickly people on the planet?  Definitely not.  It is humbling to think of how I would hate to be greeted at the end of a work day by a grumbling spouse or harangued with a "honey-do" list a mile long and an equal amount of criticism to go along with it.  How would I react if every time I tried to get attention, the people most important in my life brushed me off with an abrupt, "I'm busy right now," or "I don't have time."  

"If you would be loved, love and be lovable." -Benjamin Franklin

Do you know a person without the desire to be loved?  Of course not.  But, how many people do you know who are completely content in all of their relationships?  There are some out there, and what a delight they are to know and learn from; their countenances truly shine.   I fear, however, that there are far more people out there in a situation similar to mine.  Quick to point out faults and pick apart weaknesses.  We're not a world full of Peggy Bundy bon-bon eaters, but we do spend too much effort wondering why our friends don't reach out to us more often and why our family members are distant.  

We need to pour out sincere, unselfish love on a daily basis.  It needs to become a habit in our everyday lives.  Learn what makes your husband smile and do it.  Pay attention to your child's latest passion, learn about it, and engage them.  Smile when your loved ones are around and surprise them with unexpected praise.  Maybe it's become a habit to complain with friends about everything wrong in the world.  Next time you get together, spread compliments around on what wonderful women they are.  Or, better yet, pay attention to their normal complaints and troubles. I guarantee we're missing out on ample opportunities for service and love when we spend our days only focusing on what we want and what we're missing. 

"You selected him."

A recent study concluded that women are stressed because their husbands are ugly. They determined that while courting and as newlyweds, we are blinded to a person's look by the good things they do and love they pour out upon us.  Over the years, as the courting ends we're left with the less-than-attractive facade covering a realistically attractive inner being.  My husband and I have gotten a fair share of joking out of these findings, but there is real inspiration in it.  In most cases the person we wed on our wedding day is the same person we were married to the next day and the same person we are still married to today.  Our rose-colored glasses may be fading enough to allow us to see some of their shortcomings, but those have probably existed from day one and they may have even been endearing way back then.  

My point is, he's the person you chose to fall in love with.  I'm not implying that the world is inhabited by women who hate the man their married to, but we do, as whole, tend to be a little critical.  We knit-pick and nag.  I'm suggesting that the next time we feel the fleeting urge to complain again about the dirty socks on the floor or argue about who should change the oil in the car, that we should stand back and sneak a look at the man standing before us.  I hope the person we allow ourselves to see standing before us is the man and the tender spirit we chose to love all those years ago.

"Love is a spiritual attitude. As you love God, love your mate."

Love is a gift from God.  He has given it to us asking little in return.  To spread it amongst the people we meet.  To make the world a better place by sharing love with others.  To remember Him and all we have been given.  

This was my "ah-ha" moment while listening to this lecture on love.  My Heavenly Father has given me more love than I deserve and continues to pour it out upon me.  His Son made the sacrifice to come to the Earth and leave a followable example of how to administer love perfectly.  There is not a chance that my earthly relationships will flourish if I am not fully cultivating my spiritual relationship with they who embody the essence of love.  As I become closer to them, pray to them, and seek for guidance, I will discover greater strength and desire to spread love to the people in my home, my community, and the world.  The more I study the creators of love, the more I will understand the way it works and the good it can do.  I will be more accepting of myself, more genuine to my friends, more serving to my family.  

My desire on this Valentine's Day is that we, as women, will have the desire to find love within ourselves.  Love who we are.  Love the people we have chosen and have been given.  Love people who haven't asked for love.  And love the One who has given us the opportunity.

In My Heart On Thursday-

"Dante was so wrong.  At the lowest point, at the nadir of the ninth circle of hell, Satan will be sharing eternally cold space with treasonous brownnosers who abandon their principles and do what is wrong for the sake of a good grade, or applause.  And these brownnosers will have to lick Satan's razor-studded butt forever and ever, with their tongues."

-Carlos Eire,  Waiting For Snow In Havana, p. 232

In My Heart On Thursday

"One of our sons was spending a few days incarcerated in a local facility to 'pay his debt to society.'  As I looked at his sorrowful countenance behind that glass wall, my heart nearly broken, I only wished I had held and rocked that baby boy.  I couldn't, as hard as I tried, think of a specific time when I had held him on my lap and kissed his head, face, and ears and held him close to my heart.

I had washed that boy, scolded him for misdeeds, sent him to school, even taken pictures of him, but I couldn't remember putting my lips next to his ear and whispering tender, loving, happy words that might have echoed in his memory when he needed them.  When my arms couldn't get to him through that terrible glass barrier, I wanted to remember how it felt to hold him and I wanted him to remember how it felt to be held and loved by his mother.

So, if I could go back, I would hold and rock and sing and whisper love to my child every single day."

                                                                      -Excerpt from Delta, Utah, Ensign Magazine, July 1996