Thankful Thirty #28 (Home)

It is time to find a new home.  We love the house we've been in for the past 3 years, but it is time to pack and go before the walls burst at their seams.  We need an office space that isn't splayed across the dining room table.  We need a laundry room that doesn't play the role of kitchen 6.5 days of the week.  We need outdoor storage so our strollers, camping equipment, fishing gear, golf clubs, picnic toys, spare electrical parts, life jackets, ski boots, bike trailer, roller blades, fondue pots, spare wallpaper, backpacks, and air mattresses aren't all jammed into one uninsulated closet in our bedroom.  And we need to be able to walk through the whole place without tripping over baby things (or, worse, babies).

The hunt has begun, and of course we had to start out with nearly irresistible temptation.  There is a house for rent 1 block from where we live now that looked as close to my dream home as I can imagine ever finding.  A long driveway so it sets off the road.  Next to the elementary school with a gate in the fence to get through.  A wall of windows on the north side overlooking an expansive hollow and ravine.  And totally remodeled on top of everything.  The problem?  It's above our budget but just enough to make it impossible to walk away from.

The past two weeks have been a sincere test of willpower on my part.  That's how long we made ourselves wait before going to look at it.  We figured if it didn't get snapped right up, maybe it was meant to be.  Of course in the back of my mind I knew that if it didn't get snapped up there might be something wrong with it, but the idyllic abode I'd built it up to be in my mind kept me dreaming.

We looked at it this morning.  It took two minutes to get from our driveway to the front door and my kids didn't think it was strange at all because they could still see the park they play in and the neighbors they know and love.  And as soon as I walked in the door I knew this isn't the next place our family will call home.

Don't get me wrong, the layout was great, the windows and view were amazing!  There was a basement with two large pantries we hadn't been expecting, and also a patio out the back door.  Past that red flags went up in almost every room.  The bedroom walls were freshly painted, but the stucco walls were crumbling and black mold was poorly hidden.  The bathroom vanity that looked high quality in the listing photos was actually wooden, fading, and showing signs of rot due to the lack of windows or ventilation fans.  And the kitchen with it's new stainless steel appliances and marble counter tops were only a distraction from the matted carpet and exposed electrical wires behind the cupboard doors.  As we finished up our walk through,   I couldn't ignore the thought gnawing inside of me that the amount of cosmetic improvements done on the house must be covering up an equal amount of structural or mechanical problems with the house.

And that was it for me.  All the dreaming I've done since first seeing the listing, and worrying about falling in love with a place we couldn't afford, were mitigated instantly.  Not for one moment did I consider moving my boys into a bedroom with mold.  As we drove the two minutes back home I talked to my husband about the reasons we were comfortable letting this house go and he said that he agreed with me.  Before he left to go to work, though, I need to be sure.  I asked him,  "Are we on the same page?"

His reply? "But it has an ice maker in the refrigerator door..."

This house-hunting thing isn't going to be easy...

I'm grateful for the home I've loved and the excitement of looking for another one.

Thankful Thirty #25 (Children)

Source: pinterestcommunity.com via Michelle on Pinterest

My husband took my oldest son up the canyon for his first ski lesson of the season today and left me at home with our three littler boys.  IT WAS SO NICE!

I can't remember the last time my house was so quiet.  I can't remember the last time I've gone an entire day without yelling.  It was fun to watch our 2-year-old playing what he wanted to play for as long as he wanted to play it.  It was nice to read a book while feeding the babies instead of squeezing bottles into my role as referee.  And it was really nice to be showered in hugs and help when the ski day was through.

Another day like this might not come again for quite some time, but that's okay.  It's not one I plan on forgetting any time soon.

I'm grateful for an uplifting change in routine.

Thankful Thirty #23 (Reflecting)

Source: Uploaded by user via Michelle on Pinterest

Thanksgiving Day has come and gone and I hope you feel as refreshed from visiting with family as I do. I think in a day or two I'll put into words how moving it was to be reminded I'm surrounded by fabulous people.  Right now, though, I think we should all make a leftover turkey sandwich to eat in the car on the way out to find our amazing Black Friday deals.  See you back here tomorrow!

I'm grateful for time to reflect and appreciate anew.

Thankful Thirty #20 (Humility)

"I want, I want, I want!"  I'm sick of hearing it already.  The Toys 'R Us toy catalog came in the mail nearly a month ago and I haven't had a quiet day since.  Every time I think I've hidden it, thrown it away, or incinerated it the blasted magazine reappears, a little more banged up, but still readable and enticing.  My kids are begging me for things they've never heard of and I guarantee would hate as soon as they found it underneath the Christmas tree. To try and combat the vacuum of materialism that can put a damper on the holidays, we sat down as a family tonight for a lesson I called "I Want/I Have." First we did an activity I adapted from the Groovy Storytimes blog.  She said,

For an object lesson on greed, build a small "table." Use building blocks at either end for legs, and a rectangle of thin cardboard, (I used a postcard) for the top...Place a small pile of small stones beside the "table."(We used building blocks) Pick up one of the stones and say, "I want a _______." Fill in any item that you know your kids like. Place that stone on the cardboard tabletop. Pick up another stone and repeat.  Again, fill in the blank with anything, from a bicycle to a Playstation to a pet dinosaur. Place this stone beside the first one on the cardboard. Continue in this fashion until there are so many stones on the cardboard that it collapses. Explain to the children that, if we're not careful, our "wants" can overwhelm us.

Everyone in our family took a turn doing this and then we talked about how when we want things, we'll never have everything we want.  We'll never be happy enough.  Then we did the activity again, but this time I moved the "table" legs together to make a sturdy base for the postcard to lay on.  With each block we stacked this time, we said, "I have ______."  When all our blocks were stacked steady on top of each other, we talked about how focusing on the blessings we have to be thankful for help us to be happier and stronger.

The second part of the activity was to draw a turkey on the chalkboard.  Each person named a thing they are grateful to have and added it as a feather on the turkey.  Then I explained to my boys that every time this week that they started a sentence with "I want...", I would stop them and we'd add another "I have..." feather to our turkey.  They were excited and I thought I was a genius.

Then my great activity kicked me in my own behind.  As we ate our family night treat and got ready for bed, I caught myself choking on my own "I wants...".  Real art when we move into our next house, a newer car seat for my toddler, new pans on Black Friday, and on and on and on.  Apparently, I'm as bad, if not worse, than my kids with their toy catalogs.

I didn't add more feathers tonight because I was able to stop myself before sharing all the material things I was wishing for.  But tomorrow morning, I will add a few important things to our turkey and hopefully by the end of the week our entire family will be focused a little more on the many blessings we have to be thankful for.

I'm grateful for the lessons I learn when I thought I was teaching my kids.

Thankful Thirty #12 (Technology)

What did we do without modern technology?   I have grown so much closer to my sisters and other members of my family since joining Facebook 4 years ago than I ever was before.  I wonder how we ever knew anything about each other's lives before?  The truth is, we didn't.  And so, while I know that as with anything, it's only good in moderation, I'm glad for the connections that technology brings me.

Hopping over to the Facebook tab at the top of my computer screen right now, I'm finding out  the following things:

*the 60th grandchild is on the way in my husband's family

* two of my sisters are motivating each other to exercise while on vacation together

*My parents are going on a mission trip to Texas after the holidays

*My nieces had the cutest Halloween costumes in their entire town for trick-or-treating

*My in-laws are living my dream traveling with their kids in Cambodia

All that without making any effort to search or call or ask around.  Have you had the same experience with modern technology?  How do you keep in touch with your family?

I'm grateful for the ability to keep in touch even from far away.

Thankful Thirty #9 (Parenting)

Source: pinstagram.co via Michelle on Pinterest

I chose this picture today for three reasons...

1. It made me think of the drawings plastered across my refrigerator door, my office space, and my children's bedroom walls.  My boys are ALWAYS coloring, cutting, and pasting.  I love watching them cultivate their creativity.
2. She (the bunny) looks like she's been through the wringer, or a war-zone, or my house today.  My 5-year-old NEVER runs out of energy and if his mouth is running, then he is running.  Literally.  He does almost all his thinking out loud.  And while he's telling himself whatever it is he's thinking, he's running laps through our living room, dining room, kitchen, and back again.  All day long today.  He was telling me the Cars 3 movie that was playing in his room with his Lego guys as the main characters.  Believe me when I say it could be the next Disney feature-length film, both in content and length.  At the end of the day, my head is SPINNING!
3. The most important things are not always the easiest to remember when I'm having a bad day.  Sometimes it takes all I've got to remember what's really important when it comes to that little guy. He's going to grow up one day and I have no doubt I'll be so incredibly proud of him then.  But I have the chance right now to marvel at the imagination that will catapult him to who he's going to become.  I need to remember that instead of letting it annoy me.

With tears on my cheeks, I'm grateful for 

that little 5-year-old boy

 who loves life so much he can't help sharing it with me.

Thankful Thirty #2

Source:  via Pinterest

The first 4 months of my last pregnancy were not pleasant.  I was exhausted and my body was broken down.  Feeling completely different than I did when I was pregnant with both my boys, every person I know had decided I must be carrying a girl.  I thought they must be right...but it didn't matter.  I was sick and being tested to the edge of what I could bear.

There were days it took all I had to pour cold cereal and turn on the television for Beck and Peyton before falling back into bed for the rest of the day.  It was on those days that I knew this was it for me.  Three babies was going to have to be what made up our family.  Doubled over and in tears I plead with the Lord to give me the strength and willpower to make it through my delivery and then apologized to my husband that this was going to have to be our last child.  Enduring another pregnancy was just not going to happen for me.

At the same time my husband was secretly pleading with the Lord to take this burden from me.  He was feeling guilty for the role he played in bringing this weakness upon me, and he was begging to be able to endure it for me.  As blessed as he knew we are to bring newborn spirits into our family, he admitted to God that he never wanted to see me feeling this way again.

We both knew this would be the completing of our family.

And here brings in the focus of my gratitude today:  The Lord knew too.  He heard our prayers and listened to our pleas.  He didn't chastise us for reacting in such a temporal moment, but wrapped his arms around our arms and answered back,

 "I believe you and I understand what you are going through. 

 I am near you and I will continue to be right here with you."

That is when we found out we were having twins.   

The Lord knew our hearts and recognized what he had asked of me.  Yet He also knew he had a plan for our family and it included more than just one more being.  He accepted my terms of defeat and did what he could to do to make sure His plan for us was complete.  If I, with my earthly mind and suffering, had decided to not be pregnant ever again, He sent the spirits He had left for us into the world together.

I do not know what our future holds.  There may be a day yet when we decide we do need to grow our family.  What I do know is that in the moment when I needed the Lord to accept all I had left to give to Him, he kept in mind His plan for me.  

I am grateful for a Heavenly Father 
so personally familiar with me and with His plan for me.

In My Heart On Thursday (Opportunity)

 "Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"

-Evan Almighty, 

as quoted on  Latter-day Homeschooling

Family Birthday

I'm supposed to be writing a letter to my father-in-law today.  He turned 75 on Saturday and as part of the celebration, everyone was asked to write him a little message that could be compiled in a book and given to him later in the year.  Truth be told, I was supposed to write the letter every single day for the past 3 months and now that I'm one day past the deadline, I'm having complete writer's block.  Naturally...

On Saturday all of my husband's nearby family gathered at their dad's house to help with the "yardwork."  That term being completely an understatement.  With a hodge-podge combination of chainsaws, hedge trimmers, hacksaws, chippers, brooms, rusty files, and when all else failed, pure strength of muscle, they attacked the forest of russian olive trees overtaking the backyard ravine and made a clearing in the front yard that turned up an actual sidewalk along with a set of newspaper route inserts stuffed in the overgrowth in 1993.  The project wasn't the brainchild of a considerate child or two, but the humble gift request from a father who has been lovingly cultivating a jungle to rival the Amazon for as many years as any of them can remember.  The second understatement would be to say there was much rejoicing...

The entire event was a sight to see.  My father-in-law raised an incredible family.  They know how to work together and enjoy each other's company.  Even on a blistering hot day with thorns puncturing thick-soled shoes and more scratches than if they'd survived a chicken fight, they were happy and joking and making the work seem easy.  The teenage grandkids were just equally as intense in fulfilling grandpa's birthday wish and the littlest ones were in heaven with the evolving backyard obstacles.

I try to never take for granted that I've been welcomed into such a focused and devoted family.  Of course there's drama and of course I have moments when I envy the families who live far away, but sometime in the past 75 years a man figured out the secret to being and raising people of good moral character and value and he deserves more recognition for that than he'll ever want to take.

Oh, that I could just use this as my letter....

Times Two

"Why did they send you in here today?"

"Just my normal 20-week ultrasound."

"Have you been measuring larger?"

Instant thought to myself: "Great, I'm a month farther along."

Actual response to the questions: "Nope."

LONG pause and then LONG grin...

"Um, there are two babies in there..........................................."

Yep, twins.  Coming out of my body and into our family in September.  Two more boys to add to my all-boy family.  Guess it's a good thing I had my travel mental breakdown 6 weeks ago...

Am I Traveling, Am I Not (A Follow-Up)

I have been on an emotional roller coaster since my post last week and woke up this morning thinking I should share with you where I'm heading.  Thank you for the amazing advice and concern and encouragement I received from several of you!  That's absolutely the best part about writing and putting myself out there.

The big picture answer from my little breakdown is that I am definitely dealing with a life issue.  The struggle between dreams and reality isn't solved overnight and doesn't have a 1-2-3-step process to resolution.  What does that mean?  I'm not going to simply wake up one day having dropped the need to travel and explore and be free from routine.  I can wake up each day recognizing that not every year is going to be a big travel year.  This year, for starters, is not going to find me cavorting overseas and now that I've thought about that clearly, I've accepted it completely.

Even in my muddling last week, I never once considered that I was now trapped in my house, in my yard, in my little community.  Utah provides an incredible opportunity for so many different types of exploring in a very short distance and with summer coming my mind is already packed full of weekend excursions and activities.  That will never change in me, and is just as valid an opportunity to teach my kids about environments different than their own as any other place I could take them in the world.

There is a truth to work through and accept that my freedom to wander the world freely has dwindled and changed.  Yet, right now as I watch my kids squeal while blowing soap bubbles in their breakfast cups it doesn't seem daunting or life-sucking.  My passport application is in the mail and I can keep dreaming.  I never again want logistical details to be what keeps me from dreaming.  But for today I think I'll tackle the housecleaning and the parenting and be excited when my husband gets home.  I'm going to enjoy my family right here where life finds me.

(As part of my "therapy" I promise this summer I'll share some of my adventures with you,

 including my upcoming trip to flea markets of the Heartland,

 and playing tourist with my sister in Southern Utah's national park playland)

The Journey That My Heart Is On

My husband is in Seattle this week.  My boys and I were going to meet him there for the Easter weekend and go exploring on the Olympic Peninsula, but the the weather forecast was for low 50's and rainy.  We're not going.  We were going to go to the Redwoods for my 2-year-old's birthday, but we didn't.  I wanted to drive to San Diego, leave my kids with family, and go on a cruise this summer before the baby comes.  Completely off the table.  And the year-long adventure I've been dreaming about?  Most definitely not going to happen.

In full disclaimer, my kids and I are going back to the Sparks Flea Market next month to hang out with my family.  I used all my frequent flyer miles and all our free hotel nights to get us there.  They were going to waste and it's not looking like I will be using them for anything else anytime soon...I don't travel anymore.

Would you mind being the bounce board for my therapy?  

First, I never have renewed my passport.  The money always kept going elsewhere.  The cruise I mentioned earlier would require a passport and applying now would probably not see that beautiful blue book back in my hands until I'm too pregnant to be sailing.  One weekend I had an idea to fly to Canada and go camping in Banff National Park this summer, or to drive to Alaska to visit friends, but those are things I also can't do without a passport. Please don't offer the advice that I could expedite my renewal.  I know.  That adds to the cost which has been inhibiting me all these months and appears to be staunchly implanted in my brain as an excuse not to go get my new photo taken tomorrow.

Second, life happens when you don't realize you're looking right at it.  For 15 years I've had a personal philosophy that people don't need to settle down until they have children that start school.  And with today's technology, that's not even a resolute reason to change your wandering lifestyle if your family is still out there  having fun.  Five years ago when I had my first baby my ideals didn't change, but since then the trips have become routinely shorter and closer to home.  I HATE when people tell me having kids changes things.  I don't think it's an excuse to quit doing things.  How could I have let that happen to me?  

Now I have my soon-to-be kindergartner registered in an online curriculum  that would enable us to keep taking off on far-away adventures.  So what happens?  Life, again.  All the money we'd saved and sacrifices we've made to pack up and leave town weren't for nothing.  They've just turned out to not be for what we'd thought they would be.  Medical bills for new babies and broken arms and who knows what else is to come turn out to cost just about the same amount of money as backpacking around the world for 9 months in bliss.

As for the third and final reckoning in my brain?  My husband has decided he likes living a comfortable suburban life with a safely predictable job, all of his hobbies, and extra-curricular responsibilities.  He has contentedly settled down.  He won't tell me that matter-of-fact, but it's time for me to accept and start dealing with it.  How do I know that's where he's at in his life right now?  He's quit getting excited when I call out of the blue with a hair-brained plan for where we should take off to on the weekend.  I used to jump in the car and show-up unexpectedly wherever he was working out of town, but now he as much as tells me it'd be more responsible if I stayed home and saved the money.  He's in his fourth year of a job that was always supposed to be the hold-over until a great new adventure came along, but now he talks about a year from now when he'll be working more in the office and less on the road.  The final blow?  The year-long traveling life change I believed in wholeheartedly never evolved further than a passing whimsy to be discarded quickly in my husband's mind.  

Having now had my equivalent hour on the couch, how do I evolve from here?

I have no idea.  Always in my mind are the thoughts that I'm being tested and need to learn to be happy in the moment with the circumstances surrounding me.  That it is noble and normal to live in one house & one town with predictable days forever.  I feel guilty that my vision of motherhood, marriage partnership, and family life is so different from everyone else.  I struggle with wondering why I have to be the one that pretends to be something different than what is deeply rooted inside me.  I dread hearing people tell me not to give up on my dream or lose the wandering part of my soul when I don't see how there is any other option for me.  I don't want to be one of those, "When the children are older," or "We'll do that when we retire" type of people, but that is exactly what is happening. 

That is what is happening to me.  Part of me is being buried and the tightening I feel in my chest when I admit it so I can let it go confirms that I've barely embarked on the most challenging journey yet that my heart has been asked to travel.

Jumping On Pre-Bandwagon

I'm going on record today to declare I'm voting Ann Romney for next First Lady!  I don't know how that's going to work since I'm not yet enamoured with her husband, who would obviously have to be elected in order for my vote to make a difference, but every time I hear her speak my heart is stirred and I find myself longing for genuine compassion and transparent values in the White House.

I do not necessarily have a bone to pick with Michelle Obama.  I believe she's a great mom and she has championed worthy causes during her time of influence, but she does not inspire me.  I won't go into the reasons why-I'm not sure I've investigated them all within myself.  What I am aware of is an emotional yearning to be encouraged and led by someone like me.

Now, Ann Romney and I obviously are not the same people in innumerable ways.  Our upbringing and backgrounds are caverns apart.  Our husbands have chosen vastly different career paths.  Her health struggles are immensely more challenging than anything I've thus far been asked to bear.  Acknowledging all that, I listened to this interview several months ago and was brought to tears realizing that in so many ways she is just like me.

 
This clip is long, but I hope you'll listen.  
Again, not for Mitt Romney's words, but for hers. 

Here I will admit that my thoughts do have an LDS connection, but I am NOT telling you I like Ann Romneybecause she's a Mormon.  Prior to listening to this interview, I had never considered or believed that members of the LDS church talk differently than other people.  Yet, I listened to her speak about her family, her love and her fears for them, and I believed she could be any lady I've ever sat next to in a church Relief Society Meeting.  She wasn't speaking tenets of doctrine.  She was speaking from what is truly in her heart.  She holds her family together-leads them and guides them-through her faith and conviction.  I know she would do that as well for our country.

Also a little while ago, I happened to be clicking through the channels and landed on this diatribe by Neil Cavuto.  

While not entirely his typical snarky wit and humor, the sentiments once again moved me to tears and left me begging for the stars to align and put this remarkable woman on the national stage where she can work to motivate the American people in the same way she inspires me.

If the political talking heads are ever right about anything, we are about to be enveloped by video of Ann Romney stumping for her husband on the campaign trail.  The next time you see her introducing her husband or hear someone criticizing Mitt's likability, I hope you'll take a deeper look into Ann's genuine intentions and think what it would be like to have that kind of woman standing beside the President of our United States.

Uniquely December: Go Caroling Day

Did you grow up in a family that went Christmas caroling?  Every year our Camp Fire groups would climb on a haywagon and sing our way through the streets of our little town.  Sometimes we would walk the halls of the local nursing home as well.  Although I grew up in a family that loved to sing, I only remember us caroling as a family one time.  I'm sure I enjoyed it, but I only specifically remember one house where we sang.  It was my mom's friend, a single lady who's children were grown, and while I'm sure she loved it, the longer we sang the sillier I felt.  I just wanted to get out of there.

I wanted to find a cheerful uplifting video of Christmas carolers to share with you today.  Instead what I found was an Internet FULL of amateur videos conveying everything that I remember being painful in my own caroling life (freezing cold, people looking at you bored and confused).  So, sorry.  No classic caroling videos.  

With my search at a dead end, I decided to share the two videos that amazed me and made me smile.  I hope you enjoy!

3 songs, each one better than the last

It'll get addictive...

Do you have plans this week for Christmas caroling?

Uniquely December: Find An Evergreen Day

Today I'm re-sharing a post of one of my favorite childhood holiday memories ...

The winter holidays are meant for kids.  Santa Claus is real, snow falls solely for sledding and building snow families, and a baby (just like I used to be, they'll say) was born in the hay.  When else do we let them bring trees in the house or bury them with brand new toys, shiny paper, and glittery ribbon?  In the thick of it, they'll tell you every bit of it is magical.  It's not until we get a little older that particular pieces of that holiday magic begin to plant themselves in a special part of our memory.  For me, the enchantment was the Christmas tree.

Growing up in Iowa, the formula for the perfect Christmas tree involved waiting for a bitter cold day and swirling biting winds.  The whole family piled out of the station wagon at the country Christmas tree farm, picked up a hacksaw and trudged acres and acres to the farthest, most un-harvested hill.  The arguments then ensued as six girls poured out their hearts in defense of their " perfect"  tree.  Ultimately, Mom got the one she wanted, and the saw went to work chopping down her tree.

The adventure continued on as we dragged our enormous tree back across the snow-laden hills looking for a tractor and trailer willing to give us a ride back to our car.  If we were lucky, the tree would fit in the baler-one year it would not-and a great big Christmas tree bundle got strapped to the top of the car.  Piling back into the station wagon, we raced home to set up our tree.

The happy memories don't end there.  Getting the tree home was only half the act.  Enter Pa-pa and his voice of reason.  "Dawn, that tree is too big.  It won't fit in our house."  He was right nearly every year.  The tree's trunk always  received a second round of shearing before taking it's place front and center in the living room window.

After the tree was decorated and lit, we enjoyed seeing more and more presents accumulate underneath.  We would plug in the lights in the late afternoon and sometime before going to bed, Mom and Dad would unplug it again.  Until Christmas Eve.  On Christmas Eve we all knew the twinkling lights stayed on all night.  Early in the morning (or later in the morning depending on how old we were getting to be), six girls would tumble out of bed, shuffle into the living room and be greeted with the most breathtaking sight!  The glow of the Christmas tree illuminated the room, shining off wrapping paper, and calling attention to a big bag from Santa. Spread out on the floor, in front of the tree, were six stuffed-to-the-brim stockings inviting us to come and partake.  With the allure of new toys, the moment was over in the blink of an eye, but the living room aglow on Christmas morning is what Christmas time magical to me.

Imagine then, the struggle it's been with a husband who grew up a little bit differently.  In a home that in all ways seemed even more frugal than my own, the electric bill at Christmas time apparently just went out the window.  He wants the lights on all the time, day and night and any extra time in between.  Last year we followed each other around, secretly plugging and unplugging.  I was certain he was being obstinate only because he didn't like digging around for the loose cords to fit into the socket.  There had to be a solution before we started our holiday celebrating again this year.

In come our kids.  Even before talking about getting a tree, Beck was telling us excitedly and assuredly that Christmas trees have lots of presents and candy canes.  I have no idea where the candy canes came from, but he was certain and now our tree is covered in candy canes and he's eating one every day.  The first night we had our tree up I heard Beck telling his dad that if he couldn't sleep he would just come out and look at the tree.  The second night we had our tree up, I found him Beck sleeping on the couch and when he woke up the first thing he said was, "I just wanted to lay here and look at this beautiful tree."

A mom's heart melts.  It's a struggle to walk by and see the lights on at all times of the day.  I want my family to know joy the way I remember it as a child.  At the same time, who am I to take away a three-year-old's joy?  Children make the holidays!

Uniquely December: National Chocolate Covered Anything Day

Last year for Christmas my sister Brooke brought homemade chocolate truffles to snack on.  I prefer to call them "Death by Christmas Treat."  This year she is upping the ante and has promised to bring the truffles but also 6 additional chocolate sweet treats.  She's going to kill me.

I'm foregoing the cocoa-based delectable in my homemade goodies this year.  Instead I'm filling my cute Christmas tins with Sugared Cranberries and Candied Nuts.  What yummies are coming out of your kitchen this holiday season? 

Curly Hair Challenge

My sister Kathy and I have been cursed...I mean blessed...with curly hair most of our lives.  Trying to figure out what to do with it has been a lifelong experiment, and so I jumped right on board a few weeks ago when she emailed a quick question to ask, "Are we going to try this?"

What is "this?"  

The 6-Week Curly Hair Challenge

Before pictures (1st, Kathy/2nd, Me)

The idea behind The Curly Hair Challenge focuses on the sulfates in most commercial shampoos.  For curly hair, these ingredients completely strip the natural oils and leave behind dry frizzy lifeless poofballs atop your head.  Eliminate the shampoo and your
hair will quickly begin re-hydrating.  Add some wiser drying and styling methods as well and the result is supposed to be perfectly coiffed locks.  

This is the 6-week plan we're following:

• Get a haircut
• Quit using shampoo all together
• Use a light conditioner to massage the scalp and break up residue/buildup
• Rinse and detangle with your fingers
• Apply deep conditioner following instructions on bottle
• Continue detangling either with fingers or a wide-tooth comb
• Let sit a few minutes then rinse lightly with cool water.  (At this stage my deep conditioner calls for another light conditioning and rinsing)
• Squeeze hair dry while still in shower
• Use a t-shirt or microfiber cloth to continue squeezing water out. Avoid terry cloth towels.
• Apply gel in a scrunching motion (Optional: add a leave-in conditioner before the gel)
• Let hair air dry
• Occasionally turn hair upside down, shake, and scrunch to break up crunchy gel spots and create volume

These are the products we're using:

~Michelle: Garnier Fructis Pure Clean Fortifying Conditioner, Ouidad Deep Treatment, Infusium 23 Leave-In Treatment, Garnier Fructis Curl Shaping Gel

~Kathy: L'Oreal Repairative Smoothing Conditioner, L'Oreal Smoothing Deep Conditioner, L'Oreal Humidity Defying Leave-In Crème, LA Looks MegaHold Gel

And 2 weeks in, here are a few of our observations:

• First, we are in complete agreement that hair gel is disgusting and we hate it.  Kathy is using only a nickel-sized amount for her whole head.  I'm experimenting with a spray gel and like it a little bit better.
• My first wash was the worst, but I'm thinking maybe I forgot to do the final rinse.  My hair felt like sludge!
• We have heard that Week 2 is the worst.  Kathy agrees and is optimistic for better results next week.  For me, my hair is actually feeling more like straw.  I've changed the products I'm using to see if I get better results.
• Neither of us usually washes our hair more than 2-3 times a week.  With this challenge we're feeling like we need to wash it everyday.  Kathy's is more greasy and where mine is usually manageable for a few days, I can't get it to do anything when I wake up in the morning. Also, my face is sometimes as greasy as it was as a teenager, which I'm sure is a result of more greasy hair.

Check back next Monday for our next Curly Hair Challenge update!

Have curly hair and want to join the challenge?  

Email your "before" photo to michelle.wanderingstill@gmail.com and let me know how it's going!

We 're following the steps found at this blog.

Lots of  great additional information available here.

Letter X

I've looked and looked for an "X" topic that would make any sense for me to write about.  There isn't anything.  So, if you'll indulge my leap, today I'm going to write about X-stitching.

Cross-stitching is pretty much the only craft skill I learned as a child that I still know how to do.  And now, for nearly 10 years, the only projects I've worked on are Christmas stockings for my nieces and nephews.  In that time I've completed 7 and I have 3 in the works right now (sorry, sisters, only 2 will be ready by Christmas-want to draw straws to see who gets pushed back to next year?)

Two of the finished ones

Of course, the irony in the time and effort I've put into these gifts for all my cute relatives?  My own children have been using every-day white socks for their Christmas stockings since they were born...

A-W

Joy

On my new blog, Eating the Nibbly Bibs, the focus is 100% joy.  Both for my two boys and for me.  I'm working out of a fabulous book named Teaching Your Children Joy where I do a daily activity with them and then record my thoughts and observations on how it went.  

Here is a post from last week:

I'm InWhat I'm learning about parenting is this:  You have to be all in.  Children grow up whether you're intensely involved or not.  The opportunity we have is to be a part of that during the short amount of time we have with them.  And we choose the degree of intensity.

During the past four years I've had ups and downs-periods of complete attention and periods of viewing from the sidelines.  The last year I'd evaluate as fairly well checked out and the results are there to prove it.  Beck and I argue like he's a teenager.  Indeed I look at him and can see exactly what 14-year-old Beck will be.  But the good news is that that's true for the good times too!  I've noticed before, and I'm seeing it now...when I'm anxiously engaged in being mom to my two boys, they smile and laugh and want to be anxiously engaged with me.  It's a lesson worth learning, and one I'm sure I'll need to keep learning again and again.

Today's Teaching Your Children Joy activity was to "make spontaneity a high priority."  Be open to letting it happen anytime and anyplace.  It's hard to get past the point when you holler "No," or "Stop," "Sshhh!", but when you do it makes the world more interesting for both you and your child.

So try it.  Let them splash in a puddle.  Follow the direction of their pointing fingers and over-enthusiastic shouts of "LOOK!"  Clear the way and let them spin the kid cart while walking through the grocery store.  They'll be happier and you might just find yourself barefooted squishing mud between your toes.  

If you have little ones, or if you don't, I'd love to have you come on over and check it out... 

Eating the Nibbly Bibs

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G Is Easy

Letters E & F were travel-related posts and today is, too, but then I promise to move on to some other interesting part of my life. The thing is, I live next door to a huge white mountain "G" and am taking a shortcut today by grabbing a post from my Utah travel blog to share with you here....

                                          The Pleasant Grove "G"

The Pleasant Grove "G" has been an important landmark for our family.  As a marker for home, we can point to it from across the valley when our little one asks how much longer until we get home.  He knows the closer we get to that letter on the mountain, the sooner we'll be home.  Along with the BYU "Y", the "G" has also served as an educational tool.  When Word World was teaching him his letters, our little one started spotting them from the freeway and hollering them out proudly.  And most recently, the giant white letter has turned into a fun game of "I Can See a G" as it moves behinds trees and buildings before reappearing a few moments later.  

We have intended to make a trek to the "G" several times.  The lack of clearly defined trail always dissuaded us, and once we discovered the much easier and well-marked BattleCreek Falls trail leaving from the same parking lot, the "G" was pretty much off our radar.  Finally this summer the giant "G" called us so scouted out a route to take us all the way there.  We left our excuses in the car and struck out on a trail that kinda sorta looked it was the right way to go.

The first part of the trail is really steep.  Our little one kept telling us it was "pretty steep," but he kept on trekking.  

 

It's interesting to get up close to a mammoth wild consonant.  On the way up we each took a guess what it would be made of-wood, rocks, concrete.  It's actually made with long strips of white-washed metal, and coming into full close-up view our little informed us we were all wrong....it's made out of chairs.  He could be right-if you think of the nylon weaving of a lawn chair painted white and giganticized, that is what the "G" is made of. 

 

We spent the rest of our time there having lunch in the center of the oversized capital letter.  It is beautiful to get above your regular life-all the traffic, the stores, and the noise; to look across the valley and realize how big Utah Lake really is, how intricately the roads are interlaced, how many reservoirs there are, and where all the dirt trails go. The opportunity to take it all in made the trip worth it, no matter the difficulty we had in getting there.   

Come visit me!  We'll take a hike and you can see it for yourself!

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