Doing Something That Makes You Happy

I went to a free concert last Friday with my family to see a band called Moosebutter.  Self-billed as a comedy acapella group, I had never seen them in person, but was promised a night of hilarity.  Not necessarily because the band is good or funny, but because my in-laws are notorious for making fun of something until you're laughing so hard they start laughing at you.

Moosebutter on Friday night consisted of four middle-aged guys (I say middle-aged hesitantly because one of them went to school with my husband and that would mean I've now labelled myself with that heavy moniker) jumping around and shouting out melodic song parodies.  I think sometimes they have only two guys and maybe sometimes they have five or six.  This night there was a beat-boxer, a phenomenal falsetto, and two other guys.  About every 10 minutes I found them genuinely entertaining, and then I morphed back into complete boredom and confusion.  The show went on for nearly two hours and while my very first impression was that this was 4 winded guys who needed to sit down after the first stanza, by the end I was at least impressed that they were all still standing.

As the show ended, the park lights came up, and we were forced to rationalize the two hours of life we'd just lost, my thoughts went this way:

~That was really bad...I think I stared straight without blinking for at least half an hour
~Alright, they obviously have an audience.  The stage was three-deep with pre-tweens that couldn't contain their enthusiasm.  And, oddly (or sadly), there was an occasional uproar of attention from the larger audience which would indicate that at least the parent's of those pre-tweens were paying attention.
~Good for them for knowing their audience and not pretending they're trying to do anything more...well, surely they hope to be something more, but for now it's a great idea to work with what you've got.

Then I got a tad bit melancholy.  As I listened to the last of the jokes putter out around me, it hit me:  These are four guys who have found something they love to do and are making a living doing it.  As I've done more research (on their humble website) I've come to the conclusion that this definitely is not a day job for any of them.  Maybe that makes it acceptably better-a hobby that people are in some degree willing to indulge occasionally.  Sounds pretty amazing!

On our way out of the venue, my husband made an effort to talk to the Moosebutter member he'd once palled around with.  That is when the oddity and reality finally hit me.  "Mr. Tim" is definitely my husband's age (just to clarify that's only around 35, we're not ancient yet).  He shared great insight on the pitfalls of performing in that particular type of venue with parent-less children storming the stage.  He looked tired, but was so obviously still the center of attention amongst all the Moosebutter groupies.  Then, as we were talking a boy looking  at least 10-years-old came up and called Mr. Tim "dad."  Everyone in our party did a double-take.  Turns out Mr. Tim has SIX kids and still finds time to dress up in a red monkey suit and babble nonsensically onstage every now and then.

Moosebutter in concert ended up being a shot in the arm for me.  Big deal that I didn't find myself entertained beyond my wildest belief, and how impressive is it that we made ourselves feel better by mocking people more willing to share their talents than we ever will be.  I have great ideas about living the life I want rather than the life society has pigeon-holed for me.  People are doing it!  Moosebutter is doing it!  I want to being it, too!

In My Heart On Thursday

"Isn't it sad that we have a job where we spend two weeks avoiding the stuff we have to do fifty weeks a year?...Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you ought to set up a life you don't need to escape from."

- Seth Godin, Tribes

Reality

My husband is in California today.  He had to get up at 4AM, wait at work for his unreliable boss to show up and take him to the airport, and get on a plane to fly to Sacramento.  He's doing 2 hours worth of work there and then driving a box truck (think Uhaul) across Nevada and arriving back home sometime tomorrow.  Oh, and did I mention that he just sent me photos of himself sitting in the co-pilot's chair in the cockpit of the jet he flew on?  I have no idea what that was all about but the grin on his face tells me that something extraordinary happened to him this morning.

What was I doing when the photo arrived?  Reprimanding my toddler for wiping his bum without toilet paper.  Losing the argument that he needed to use HOT water to wash his hands.  Insisting that he go get clean underwear instead of running around the house naked.  And hearing him tell me after he's run on the carpet that he's found poo on his feet, too.

So, what was my initial reaction to my husband's moment of joy digitally captured and sent to me over the airwaves?  Hatred and disgust, honestly.  Completely gone was the sympathy I'd felt when he'd exhaustedly crawled out of bed in the dark.  The gentle prayer I'd offered up that he would be safe and alert on his drive back our way completely buried.  Also forgotten were the laughs I'd had with my two boys just hours earlier as they piled on top of me in bed, and any thought of encouraging words or shared enthusiasm.

That's how my days tend to be.  I know my husband words hard at a job he doesn't always like.  But because he gets to leave the house, and the kids, I tell myself his life is easy.  When he gets home at night I continue on with cooking dinner or finishing the laundry, but check out from anymore taking care of the kids.  Dad's home, Dad's turn.  It seems like it's working because he loves playing with his boys more than anything on the planet, but it's probably only working because I give him no other choice.

Do you find yourself having the same thoughts or reactions with people and events in your life?  What helps you throughout the day to focus on the beautiful and fun things that are happening instead of getting buried in individual nasty moments?

How do you show your spouse/family/friends that you appreciate the sacrifices they've made for you?  And what gives you balance throughout your day?

In My Heart On Thursday

"And the truth is, we are not better than the people who are on the show...some of us just dress better. Some of us have more money. Or some of us had better luck in the pool of parents. And sometimes we went to better schools and learned to speak better. But the behavior -- all you have to do is look at any newspaper on any day, of all the famous people involved in all kinds of things. How can we say for a second, you know. If you just look at the hearings we've had in Congress lately. Are those people morally superior to the people on my show? I would hardly think so."

-Jerry Springer

In My Heart On Thursday

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

                                                                                                           ~ Steve Jobs